Sitting at the dinner table:
Chase growls at a sarcastic remark Matthew makes to him about his lack of appetite.
Matthew, in a trembling voice: “Oh, Mom! He scares me!” Matthew mimes shaking. “I’m going to have to lock my bedroom door tonight so he doesn’t get me!”
Me, rolling my eyes and looking disapprovingly at him: “You lock your bedroom door every night.”
Matthew: “Yeah, but when a serial killer breaks in, I won’t be the one killed.”
Chase, chiming in: “Well, I’m going to lock my bedroom door too, then!”
Me, feigning distress: “And I leave my bedroom door unlocked in case y’all need something in the middle of the night! I see how it is.”
Chase, looking deep in thought: “I guess I’ll have to just leave my door unlocked and fight him,” he said, referring to the supposed serial killer.
These are the conversations we have at dinner. It is not boring, it is not without excitement. I love my hooligans with every ounce of my soul. ❤️💚💜
So, This is Real Life 