I woke up this morning with the express intent to clean my house. There’s something soothing in the process. I’m alone with my music and cleaning products, and can think. . . or not. I can get lost in the process, and sometimes that in itself is mind clearing.
I took breaks to talk with friends, and sit and enjoy the day, or certain songs that came on. I wasn’t dead set on just cleaning. I was dead set on enjoying my day how I saw fit. Cleaning was on the agenda but I just wasn’t hell bent, if that makes sense. So I’d clean for half an hour and then stop and do something else and then clean some more. . . Eventually though, I successfully swept and mopped and dusted, I rearranged and organized, I did laundry, I cleaned the front porch and pulled weeds that had popped up in my planters, readying them for next weekend when I plan to go all out and get shit planted.
I told one friend that it felt like I wasn’t just cleaning my house, but cleansing it. I made a reference to burning sage, stating that while I have never fucked with sage, I knew the purpose was to get rid of bad energy. I surmised that I was sure Lysol and nice candles had a similar effect. And open windows. Fresh air and sunshine always make me feel amazing, no matter my mood. And it felt like with everything clean, I was getting rid of the past and readying myself to move forward. Wherever that may lead me, whatever may happen, I’m ready.
I also cleaned my bedroom windows, and went through some paperwork and the books and magazines that have been gathering dust on my night stand for months. I came across a quote book that I had started to go through but never finished. I love quotes, and paused to look through again. The sun was streaming through my windows, the crisp smell of a new, happy air freshener filled my nose, the new rug soft under my bare feet, Scott Stapp sang through my speaker about being ‘Weathered’, and I opened the book to the first quote, and found inspiration there.
“The Soul should always stand ajar, ready to welcome the ecstatic experience.” ~Emily Dickinson
You should always anticipate the good in life, and fucking embrace it. The sunshine, the soft things, the nice smells and wonderful music. You can have a shitshow of a day, and so long as you look for the good in it, it makes the bad easier to take in stride. You can look beyond the bad and look towards a better future. Y’all know I’ve had my share of bad. I couldn’t get through the shit storms I encounter without finding that silver lining. I welcome the good and move past the bad. That’s the only way I survive and persevere. A prime example is yesterday – sure, I had a bad start. But I also got time with one of my best friends, and my credit score jumped a ridiculous amount in the right direction and I discovered that while not an ideal way to do it, I lost a pretty serious amount of weight, too. I won’t remember the day for the bad. I’ll remember it for the good. Fuck the bad shit. I’m moving forward. And I’m gonna embrace every moment of it.
Happy Sunday, and happy mother’s day. As always, embrace what’s good in your life, and to hell with the rest.