Beautiful Contradictions

I came across this astrology thing on Facebook about where your moon sign is supposedly located. I half ass believe in how the planets alignments can effect every day life and who you are as a person. So I went to this astrology cafe website and entered my day and time of birth and where I was born. . . And it brought up this whole huge long analysis of who I am based on that information.

It basically confirmed that I’m a clusterfuck lol.

One aspect of who I am contradicts another. Extroverted but introverted, critical but open minded. Flighty but steadfast. Practical but dreamy. Decisive but indecisive. Bitchy but sweet. Feet on the ground but head in the clouds. Impulsive with a side of overthinking. Flashy but doesn’t like attention. Shy but needs attention. Intense but easy going.

So on and so forth.

The constants were that I’m a good people reader, work best with a plan, and don’t half ass anything. I am not big on material things, hate shallowness, and am earth bound. I enjoy constants and practicality, learning, and engaging life experiences.

It also said some shit about liking to travel and the sea. Maybe I just haven’t gotten to that part of my life yet. And yes, this contradicts the earth bound part.

Anyway, I’ve essentially figured all this out on my own, but it was kinda cool to see it put into words by someone else. To see there may be a reason behind my contradictive nature. Why I love rock music and driving fast but need a scenic drive and mellow folk music too. Why some days I feel a need to do all the things but others I’m curled up with a book all day, ignoring reality. Why I am a jeans and t-shirt kinda person but love pretty skirts, too. If a sailor and a trucker had a child, it would be me apparently since vulgar language is part of who I am, but I also have the ability to paint a beautiful picture with my words as well. I like my music loud enough to split my eardrums but only until 7pm or so because then I need my jammies and a book.

I’m a beautiful contradiction, and I’ve learned to embrace it. I feed as many aspects of who I am as possible, and all in all I have a pretty good balance. My kids are taken care of and my other responsibilities but yet I’m able to feed my own desires as well with books and writing and music and yoga and gardening. And I’m grateful that I have this knowledge, that I have taken time in my life to soul search and think and breathe and find out what makes me tick so I can avoid as many stressful situations as possible. I know what triggers unrest in my soul and can avoid it most of the time. And when I can’t I know how to bring peace back into my life. Not everyone knows themself so well. And not everyone has embraced who they are as a person, always trying to fit the molds that society encourages. I am not normal. I am not predictable. I am not status quo. And I’m okay with that.

If your interested in your own analysis, visit https://astro.cafeastrology.com and click on ‘create a new chart.’ Its lengthy as hell but overall interesting.

Happy Saturday folks, and happy soul searching.

Published by: A. Elizardo

Single mother to two amazing boys, sister to an inspiration, and the daughter of two opinionated, sarcastic, fun loving individuals that are no longer physically with us. Music, writing, reading, my family - living and gone - are what keep me going as I put on my rose colored glasses and navigate us through this crazy world.

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