For Right Now

It’s Wednesday. 

Yeah, I know. News flash. However, it’s been a crazy week thus far and it feels like any day of the week but a Wednesday. 

Monday, Clarice was her wonderful, charming self and decided to pull some nonsense. A part no bigger than a Lego went out, causing her to not want to shift. It’s called a relay, and whoever built, or planned how the vehicle should be built,  is an idiot because it was placed by the front drivers side wheel well – causing it to continually get wet. With Sunday’s rain, it said enough is enough and finally went out. The mechanic who replaced it showed me the part – it was green with corrosion and rust. On the plus side, I think the part has been failing since I purchased the vehicle, since Clarice shifts like a dream now, and there were times before when I questioned the transmissions capability to keep going. So, there’s that, at least. 

I spent Monday waiting for bad news, thinking this was Clarice’s final hurrah and the trans had gone out. I kept myself busy, Grandma and I cleaned out the garage while we waited for the mechanic – an old friend of hers – to call back and tell me I was ten kinds of fucked. Luckily he called back with the news about the relay and the good deal he had given me to work on it. So Clarice lives to strand me another day.

Otherwise it’s been same shit, different day. I knocked a lot of stuff out at work that I’ve been putting off, took care of some stuff for brother, and am planning ahead for the boys fall break – its looking like a busy week with school conferences and the holiday.  Between my personal to do list, my work to do list, planning ahead so my life isn’t a fucked up mess at the end of the month, and day light savings I’ve been exhausted and going to bed on time for the first time in awhile. Except yesterday, but I had to get my music post written, it was driving me nuts that it wasn’t done yet. The boys are keeping me on my toes – Chase learned how to spontaneously burp, and when I forbade him to do it at the kitchen table, he farted instead, so that was cool. Matt is boasting a 3.9 GPA and has decided to randomly come downstairs and tell me useless things while I’m busy. “My parents are my mom and my dad,” he told me last night, interrupting my writing train of thought for this randomness. I would love a solid ten minutes of uninterrupted quiet, but I guess that’s expecting too much of my life.

It’s hectic and crazy, as always. I don’t stop thinking and doing from the time I wake up til I go to bed. I’ve been continually stiff throughout my shoulders and neck, probably stress, and the only thing keeping me from being in continuous pain is my short morning and evening yoga sessions. I feel the muscles stretch and the tension release, and it’s a wonderful thing. But nothing is bad right now. I’m hoping it remains that way through the holidays. Clarice can just keep on getting down the road, and my kids can continue to be healthy, as well as the rest of my family. We don’t need any major catastrophes for the time being, thanks. 

So what am I grateful for today? I’m grateful for my life as a whole. I’m grateful for every piece of it. All of the hardships and lessons that I have encountered and learned have prepared me to be grateful for where I am and who I am. I’m not a millionaire, I’m not famous, I don’t have the white picket fence and 2.5 kids and all that nonsense that I wanted growing up. But I am working, and I am valued and loved by many. I don’t have the white picket fence dream life, but I also am not married to an abusive asshole living in a shack, either. So I’ll take my single mother status with much thanks. I’m grateful that things aren’t horrible right now. I’m grateful that life is quiet, at least quiet for me, right now. 

Happy Wednesday!

Published by: A. Elizardo

Single mother to two amazing boys, sister to an inspiration, and the daughter of two opinionated, sarcastic, fun loving individuals that are no longer physically with us. Music, writing, reading, my family - living and gone - are what keep me going as I put on my rose colored glasses and navigate us through this crazy world.

Categories every day life, family, Grateful, Random thoughtsLeave a comment

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