I stayed too long talking to Chase’s aunt when I picked him up this evening after work. But for fucks sake, sometimes us mom’s need to vent and compare notes and just verify that we aren’t the mess we think we are sometimes. It was only 20 minutes or so, and we deserve adult interaction. So while the kids played we talked, and it was enjoyable.
Cue the shit storm.
Twenty minutes of me time completely fucks my world up. This put me getting home just before 7. I had bedding that needed to be washed and dinner to make. Homework for the little one and his fundraiser is due tomorrow and I hadn’t put any thought into what I was buying. So I changed into more comfortable clothes, preheated the oven for chicken nuggets, and started laundry. My plan was to look at homework and the order while dinner cooked, skip my own dinner because Lord knows I could stand to miss a meal, and tackle the rest after dinner.
As I was talking to the kids grandma about the order I pulled the bag of chicken nuggets out of the freezer. Ten for Matt, 4 for Chase.
I got to seven and then came up empty.
“Fuck me, there’s only seven!” I exclaimed. I looked at the clock. 713pm. “And it will be fucking 8 o’clock if I were to order pizza. Jesus petes.”
Swearing is an integral part of my life, folks. Gosh darn doesn’t cover half the situations I find myself in. This one included. Chase was due to be in the tub in 15 minutes and I hadn’t even opened his backpack to see what his homework was yet.
The kids grandma suggested I go to get a hot n ready, and that’s exactly what I did.
The line was ridiculous of course, because why wouldn’t it be at almost 8pm on a Wednesday night when I was in a hurry?
I got home just before 8, so I guess I shaved a couple minutes off. Threw pizza on plates and called the kids to the table. I started talking to Chase about his book fair and noticed Matt was quieter than normal and looked bothered. So I asked him what was wrong.
Tears. My twelve year old was sniffing and wiping his eyes and explaining in a broken voice that he currently had a C in math and he bombed his pre test and the actual test was tomorrow and he was gonna fail the class and why did he have to be in advanced math because he sucked at math and why couldn’t he just be in regular math?
My twelve year old, God love him, can be a drama queen.
The problem here is that I am horrible at math. Look at me write. I have a talent. But ask me to do more than add one digit numbers and I’m asking for a calculator. And this 7th grader is dealing with exponents and simplifying fractions and not just finding what ‘x’ equals but there’s two fucking ‘x’s to find in the damn problem. Oh boy.
So I got Chase started on his work, simply tracing numbers (big thanks to his teacher for an easy one tonight!) And began to try and help Matt. I could not do the work. I dealt a little with some of this. . . My freshman year of high school, and I failed the class, for the record. But I could see that he missed a lot for not showing his work, being in a hurry and not completing thoughts on story problems, and being sloppy. My son has ADHD – over diagnosed yes, but if you met him you would know that he has a legitimate case of squirrel syndrome. I talked him off the ledge by refocusing him. Slow down, show your work, and focus kid. You got this. The problems he didn’t understand I had him explain to me how to find the answers and boom. By him teaching me, we figured it out. Crisis averted. I’m patting myself on the back for this one. Going in I didn’t know how I was going to help him being I suck at math but I pulled it off.
Okay. So Chase’s homework is done, Matt’s homework is done. Dinner is solved and easy to clean up. I threw Chase in the bath and asked Matt to keep his ears on him while I went and switched the laundry in the basement. I found a stashed energy drink – I’ve sworn off of them but today I needed it – and got Chase out of the tub and went through our nightly routine – brush teeth and take vitamins and allergy med because the boy is allergic to life – and then I went in to make his bed. Being a new kindergartener he’s been introduced to the library and has taken a new notice to his own large and extremely full bookshelf, and for the first time in a long time he walked up to me with a book in his hand and asked me to read to him. Granted it wasn’t some Newbery Medal winner, but we read Billy’s Booger together and had a good time. Did I mention I love having boys? I’d much rather read about boogers than princesses any day! Matt even joined us at the tail end.
So. Chase is in bed. Now to look at that order. I looked over Matt’s homework one last time and we were both satisfied with it. I stepped away for a bit to smoke and write this. It’s almost ten and I still need to pack lunches and shower and you know I need some namaste in my life after today. Oh. And Matt just asked me to quiz him on his science vocab.
Just another evening in the life.
So, This is Real Life 