It’s funny to me how this writing thing works – I literally wrote this short piece in about ten minutes time several days ago, because it was itching at me and I couldn’t concentrate on the task at hand until it was finished. Then, I forgot about it until today. Writing comes in waves for me – absolute obsession with completing a piece, to absolute negligence, forgetting that I have a pending draft, or that I even have this gift. Regardless of my long bout of negligence, it’s been nice to be back behind the keyboard again here recently, getting some of the words that circle my brain out into the world. If it lasts, it lasts. If I put the keyboard away again for weeks or months, that’s okay, too – I don’t control the wave, I just enjoy the ride.
Things are more than a little off kilter right now.
Life is just. . . Like this. You will have periods of light, and periods of dark. Times when everything goes as planned, or better than you could even imagine. . . And times that it feels like every breath you take creates a whole new problem to navigate.
Nothing in life is permanent. That’s the biggest lesson I’ve learned over the last few years. It may be a shit show right now, but it won’t last. On the opposite side of that, we should enjoy every good moment we have, too. Because those moments don’t last, either. Life is one big roller coaster, and keeping impermanence in perspective helps a lot with the ride. You appreciate more of what you have and the people that come into your life. . . and the bad shit affects you a whole helluva lot less.
I have seen, on more than one occasion, an absolutely impossible scenario work out with an absolutely impossible solution, at the absolute last moment.
I have also seen perfect storms of chaos create shit show upon cluster fuck. Life giveth, and life taketh away.
Regardless of the bad, I believe in magic, and in miracles. Even though it seems that I am faced with adversity quite often, I believe that my positive outlook and the fact that I embrace the impermanence that this life offers us has a huge impact on how those adverse situations work out.
Which – sort of – brings us to today’s quote.
Kind words will unlock an iron door – Turkish Proverb
It immediately called to mind a situation I am currently navigating. It’s more than I’m willing to discuss openly, but it is truly the cluster fuck of all cluster fucks. And while I’m navigating it, and getting shit done, it is something that I never saw coming, and threw me for a loop.
It put me at the store at 8pm one evening a couple weeks ago. I was at my wits end, stressed beyond any stress I’ve experienced in several years. I walked up to the check out, and was met with a bright, contagious smile from the clerk running the register. While I was stressed, I also was running on the high of knocking shit out and making things happen, so my mood wasn’t bad – I guess I was more high strung than anything. In that moment, I was a victim of circumstance. Give me positivity, and I’m going to meet it with more positivity. Give me negativity, and I might want to fight. That being said, seeing this smile immediately put one on my own face. We exchanged conversation as my items were rung up – I can’t remember what was even said, but I do remember that we both offered the other encouragement and kindness. I left the store feeling bolstered.
I have run into some shitty people in this life. People who are gloomy and negative, who have nothing nice to say about anyone or anything.
They don’t have a place here. Not in this moment, not in this life.
I have my moments of discouragement. I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t, and if I was truly eternally bright and happy, it would mean that there was something wrong with me – not coping with reality is a real problem.
I always tell people – I’ll be fine. I just have to bitch a little about it, first.
And that’s how I approach life. There are many situations that one encounters that are outright awful. And it is totally okay to be frustrated, and upset. But to stay there – that’s where the problem lies.
And so, even though I was handling an outright shitty situation at that moment in the store, I offered kind words to the clerk. I smiled, and interacted.
Because I knew that the shitty situation wasn’t permanent, and there was no need for me to live in discouragement, and no need for me to have a shitty attitude when interacting with others. I needed the happiness and brightness in that short conversation with a stranger. It renewed my faith, even though we didn’t discuss anything about my current situation.
To come to the point –
You never know how your kindness can affect another human.
It can be as simple as the conversation I’ve mentioned here. Or complimenting someone, or reaching out to check in with a friend you don’t talk to often. Sending that kindness out into the world has a ripple effect. Sending that kindness out into the world brings you joy and satisfaction, too – at least, it does me. Seeing a stranger’s face light up when I compliment their outfit or hair is a whole different feeling. Knowing that I made a friend’s day brighter by reaching out makes me happy.
There are so many benefits to kindness – so many doors that it unlocks. Be that person. Be that bright spot. You never know just how important that little bit of kindness can be to someone else.
Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash
So, This is Real Life 